Today as I think about how shameful I use to be about MY DRAMA this post is a must.
There was a time I hated my name NOT because I did anything wrong BUT the association of my name was enough to drive anyone crazy. When I was 19 years old a private domestic dispute went very public as my life was threatened.
Like yesterday I remember running down the streets with my four year old daughter as shots were fired neither one if us was hit.
That’s only because of Gods grace and mercy. By the end of this dispute a cop was shot in the neck and the young man was shot several times. Both survived the day.
Years of shame and guilt consumed me as I felt sorry for the cop. She left her house that day not knowing what the day would bring as her shift started. I wanted to reach out to her. Never got the chance to as she passed two years later from her gunshot wounds.
You know they say the guilty always cry when they hear of death. That was me as I walked into Family Video with my daughter. I got the call that she passed. Tears filled my eyes as I turned away and back to my car.
I did make it to her funeral. Cop cars filled the street, from all around the state. She lay in her white dress. The first time I actually laid eyes on her. I don’t remember seeing her while the trial was going on. The room was filled with reporters and cops.
I wanted to address her family and say something. Unsure of what to say, I just stayed in my seat until it was time to view her body. This day I felt guilt and shame.
Today because God has allowed me to find peace with this situation. The guilt and shame have been erased. I now use this hardship as part of y testimony.
I’m NO longer bound by what I felt. Today I want you to find that thing that keeps you bound and ashamed.
To the ladies dealing with the guilt and shame of abortion God will take that as well. I’ve been there done that as well.
Tonight turn it over to God. Let me leave this verse with you;
Instead of your shame you will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace you will rejoice in your inheritance. And so you will inherit a double portion in your land, and everlasting joy will be yours. (Isaiah 61:7 NIV)
I now have a passion to help raise awareness on Domestic Violence. Not just for me BUT to help police officers as well.
Love, Peace and Hugs,
Lady K -:)