Getting Rid of Greed

The lifestyles of the Rich and Famous seem to be more popular than the Saved and the Humble. We all desire the nice things in life BUT at what cost? What price are you willing to pay to run with the Rich and Famous? What hidden danger are you willing to face to stay in designer clothes and drive the best? I wanted this lifestyle so bad I almost paid with my life. Death was minutes away from me. All because I wanted to look nice and drive nice. I was doing both at a nice cost. Cost me sex when he wanted, sleepless nights, some name calling, some threats and some friends. One I still miss, she was the best. Spent little time around my mother she had this unbelievable radar. She could pick up on any and everything. I did drop my daughter off to her every weekend though. I would never deny her that right. I was young and felt like I had forever to live, feeling like we would be together forever. I felt like money was falling from the sky at times. I didn’t have to pay a bill he took care of all of that. In my young silly mind the ultimate provider. I had money in the bank, put some in CDS, and had some stacked at home. I was 18 fresh out of High School all smiles for a little while. I could shop when I wanted full of poison on the inside. Hood rich and miserable feeling like death was always at the door. When I wasn’t home in time the threats would start coming. When he walked in the door if he demanded sex, I was at his leisure. After all the money was really his. Was the relationship always this way? Not at all. It didn’t get this way until he had a major disappointment in his life. He failed a drug test while working at Lord Corporation. He made good money and couldn’t find a job making that kind of money. He was introduced to the hustle life and thats how it started. The money, drugs and women all come with that lifestyle. He wasn’t bad looking so lady problems not new at all. The incentive to stay was a little better. Am I saying I only stayed for the money? Not the case at all. First I felt like this was a temporary thing. He want raised this way, his mother worked hard to provide. I stayed for two reasons; first because I felt like I deserved the lifestyle, second death was the only way lout. I didn’t feel I could walk away. When things got real rough I would call a friend and sleep on her white over sized chair. I would go to the payphone and call her. If she was in she would come get me, if not I would leave a message. The message was short and sweet,”if anything happens to me he did it.” Right to the point no need to beat around the bush. I did get tired of this lifestyle just didn’t have a safe way to walk away. He would always tell me,”if he couldn’t have me NO one could.” A promise I knew he would make good on. My senior year of High School he was ready to prove that. We were over my mothers house the phone rings, it was some guy asking for me. Still unsure who it was or what he wanted. In his mind he felt like I was cheating. I, moved out months ago and some random guy is calling. I tried to talk about it. He gets in his car speeds off to his mothers house. Hours later I get a call he is now on the 4th floor at Good Samaritan Hospital. Thats the mental ward. His mother had to call the police, he went to get his gun to come kill me. In his mind the call was really someone I was cheating with. The sad part is I never ever cheated, this was all something he made up in his mind. He stayed on the fourth floor for 3 days calling still accusing me saying it was all my fault. In my head feeling guilty and shame I started to believe it was all my fault he went to retrieve the gun. Finally in his mind, he came to the conclusion it was nothing I did. Making promises this situation would never happen again. I did ask why,” he said he love me too much too much to ever cause real harm.” Like most I believed he was ready for change. Not really the case at all. The money started coming faster and not only was he smoking weed he added Xanax to his daily routine. Not a good combination of drugs at all making him more like a zombie as the days when on. Feeling stuck and hopefully crying at night calling out to friends. We went on for a few more months. The post titled Fetal Position is how it all ends. I don’t share my story for sympathy. I share for 2 reasons 1 so you don’t judge those in the situation, 2 so you will not make the same mistakes I made. I don’t speak proudly or to boost just from my humble heart. Ladies most importantly remember love does not hurt love is kind. Below are the verses I feel necessary to share. Realizing all you need is Gods light to let you shine. Hebrews 13:5 AMP Let your character or moral disposition be free from love of money [including greed, avarice, lust, and craving for earthly possessions] and be satisfied with your present [circumstances and with what you have]; for He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!] Sincerely yours, Special K!

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Pray For Those.

Afternoon, how are you today? In America today we celebrate Thanksgiving. A day set aside to give thanks and spend with family!

Today while you’re with your family have a moment of silence for those with NO family. Then pray for the child who has NO mother because her abuser took her life.

If you are with your mother give her a hug for me. My mother passed away two years ago from lung cancer. God calls us to shelter and take care of the orphans.

I’m not in a position to do that yet BUT we can keep them covered in prayer. My prayer is next year God will help me sponsor a dinner for them. The children who’s mothers are no longer here with us due to violence. As my 16 year old.daughter could be one. Until then lets keep the babies in prayer!

Shortly yours,

Special K!

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Food For Your Soul

Isaiah 62:1-12 AMP

FOR ZION’S sake will I [Isaiah] not hold my peace, and for Jerusalem’s sake I will not rest until her imputed righteousness  and  vindication go forth as brightness, and her salvation radiates as does a burning torch.  And the nations shall see your righteousness  and  vindication [your rightness and justice–not your own, but His ascribed to you], and all kings shall behold your salvation and glory; and you shall be called by a new name which the mouth of the Lord shall name.   You shall also be [so beautiful and prosperous as to be
thought of as] a crown of glory  and  honor in the hand of the Lord, and a royal diadem [exceedingly beautiful] in the hand of your God.  You [Judah] shall no more be termed Forsaken, nor shall your land be called Desolate any more. But you shall be called Hephzibah [My delight is in her], and your land be called Beulah [married]; for the Lord delights in you, and your land shall be married [owned and protected by the Lord].  For as a young man marries a virgin [O Jerusalem], so shall your sons marry you; and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you.  I have set watchmen upon your walls, O Jerusalem, who will never hold their peace day or night; you who [are His servants and by your prayers] put the Lord in remembrance [of His promises], keep not silence,  And give Him no rest until He establishes Jerusalem and makes her a praise in the earth.  The Lord has sworn by His right hand and by His mighty arm: Surely I will not again give your grain as food for your enemies, and [the invading sons of] aliens shall not drink your new wine for which you have toiled;  But they who have gathered it shall eat it and praise the Lord, and they who have brought in the vintage shall drink it [at the feasts celebrated] in the courts of My sanctuary (the temple of My holiness).  Go through, go through the gates! Prepare the way for the people. Cast up, cast up the highway! Gather out the stones. Lift up a standard  or  ensign over  and  for the peoples.  Behold, the Lord has proclaimed to the end of the earth: Say to the Daughter of Zion, Behold, your salvation comes [in the person of the Lord]; behold, His reward is with Him, and His work  and  recompense before Him.   And they shall call them the Holy People, the Redeemed of the Lord; and you shall be called Sought Out, a City Not Forsaken.

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A House Divided

Great Day, how have you been doing? I must admit staying on this journey has been a challenge. The devil is pleased with bondage. I refuse to allow him to keep me off the path.

Tonight as we enter into the Holidays lets talk about parental relationships. We have double parent homes, single family homes and the blended family. Either way unity is the goal.

I was raised by a single mother who instilled different values than my friends raised in the other two homes. Can we say one is right and the other is wrong? Not really parenting does not come with a manual.

One thing was evident in all households. Division was present from all angles. I had one friend at wits with her step mother, one friend with both parents and my mother and I at the end of our rope.

It wasn’t until I started to study the word the light bulb came on. Look at these verses below;

Luke 12:52-53 AMP

For from now on in one house there will be five divided[among themselves], three against two and two against three.  They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against her daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.

Thats when I then realized what the Bible says. However God is able to mend that brokenness. He did for my parental relationship. What is causing the division?

Well I was dating this young man, my mother was able to see what I didn’t want to see. My young mind felt she didn’t want me to be happy. Not the case at all. Like God does us it’s for our protection. As the Holidays come quickly, “Let it go!” The best thing for you.

I must admit once I was NO longer with that young man, my parental relationship was the best. What are you allowing to stand between you and any parental relationship? Do your part as the believer and, ” Let it go!” Do yourself a favor and forgive.

Tonight I will be praying God heals both sides! You only get one set of parents. Don’t wait until they are in the casket show love. Love them while they are warm, not cold.

Tonight write a few things YOU can do to change the relationship. Don’t focus on their failures. Focus on the solution!  And work on your list. The Bible instructs us to write the vision! With that being said, whats YOUR vision for this relationship?

Tomorrow, I will talk about loving the parent who was MIA!

Sincerely yours,

Special K!

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Evening Thought. THE SPIRIT of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has
anointed and qualified me to preach the Gospel of good tidings to the meek, the poor, and afflicted; He has sent me to bind up and heal
the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the [physical and spiritual] captives and
the opening of the prison and of the eyes to those who are
bound, To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord [the year of His
favor] and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, To grant [consolation and joy] to those who mourn in Zion–to
give them an ornament (a garland or diadem) of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of
joy instead of mourning, the garment [expressive] of praise instead of a heavy,
burdened, and failing spirit–that they may be called oaks of
righteousness [lofty, strong, and magnificent, distinguished for uprightness,
justice, and right standing with God], the planting of the Lord, that He may be
glorified. And they shall rebuild the ancient ruins; they shall raise up
the former desolations and renew the ruined cities, the devastations of many
generations. Aliens shall stand [ready] and feed your flocks, and
foreigners shall be your plowmen and your vinedressers. But you shall be called the priests of the Lord; people will
speak of you as the ministers of our God. You shall eat the wealth of the nations,
and the glory [once that of your captors] shall be yours. Instead of your [former] shame you shall have a twofold
recompense; instead of dishonor and reproach [your people]
shall rejoice in their portion. Therefore in their land they shall possess double
[what they had forfeited]; everlasting joy shall be theirs. For I the Lord love justice; I hate robbery and wrong with violence or a burnt offering. And I
will faithfully give them their recompense in truth, and I will make an everlasting
covenant or league with them. And their offspring shall be known among the nations and their
descendants among the peoples. All who see them [in their prosperity] will recognize
and acknowledge that they are the people whom the Lord
has blessed. I will greatly rejoice in the Lord, my soul will exult in my
God; for He has clothed me with the garments of salvation, He has covered me with
the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decks himself with a garland, and as a
bride adorns herself with her jewels. For as [surely as] the earth brings forth its shoots, and as
a garden causes what is sown in it to spring forth, so [surely] the Lord God will
cause rightness and justice and praise to spring forth before
all the nations [through the self-fulfilling power of His word].

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I Blog Because….

Great Day! Today we will honor veterans both past and present. God bless our troops and their families.

America is the land of free speech which often keeps some bound. Which leads to the reason I blog.

I blog because like many of you my life has NOT been typical round table talk. Unless people are sitting around to pass judgement. Even some Saints. Thankful God has delivered me from what people think about me.

I blog because how many people sit around talking about women who have been beat and aborted babies. How many round table discussion have you attended where healthy discussion is taking place on how to reduce teen pregnancy? Not many but when you see them you put on the ugly face and turn your nose up. Shame on you.

Remember to show the same grace and mercy God shows you. Once we do a better job of passing knowledge and less judgement we will see change.

I blog because I don’t ever want a women to feel like she is the first or last in a situation. I have made a lot of choices free will and some I had NO control over. Either way God has never left me. Please never deny the power of God.

I want to leave the following verses with you;

Isaiah 60:1-3 AMP

ARISE [from the depression and prostration in which circumstances have kept you–rise to a new life]! Shine (be radiant with the gloryof the Lord), for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord has risen upon you!   For behold, darkness shall cover the earth, and dense darkness[all] peoples, but the Lord shall arise upon you [O Jerusalem], and His glory shall
be seen on you. And nations shall come to your light, and kings to the
brightness of your rising.

Please never feel like you are alone. Your life may NOT be round table discussion yet, hold on God is changing hearts and minds!


Special K

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